But Mom, what if the other kids don't like me? | Resources | Boone Center for the Family | Pepperdine University

But Mom, what if the other kids don't like me?

It's your first year of college and you were dropped off in a new place where you don't know anyone. Or maybe it's your second year at Pepperdine and all your friends went abroad. Or maybe it's your third year and you just got back from abroad...who are the rest of these people at YOUR school? Or maybe, just maybe, it's your senior year and you want to make the most of your last year. You might be thinking, "How do I make friends?" Whether that means making new friends or continuing old friendships. It's a concern in the back of our minds, which most of the time can be our driving force to do most things here in and around Pepperdine. So what are some healthy ways to successfully make friends? Here are 6 tips to keep in mind during this school year:

1. Well for one have a positive attitude. Don't be a Negative Nancy (or Nate). Who wants to be around someone who is negative all the time? It can be really pleasant to be around someone who is encouraging and all around positive.

2. Say "yes" to hanging out with people. Unless it might be somehow compromising your morals, say "yes" to that invite of hanging out. Yea, you might not know them fully and it might be uncomfortable at first, but who knows? They could turn into your best buddies.

3. YOU plan group outings. Go to Santa Monica, play Ultimate Frisbee (with that cool rIQ Frisbee you got) on the track, hang out in a suite or apartment, cook dinner or bake desserts, have a movie night, play board games, etc- the possibilities are truly endless. If you are excited about doing an activity and willing to invite people, it's then more likely that those people will invite you to their activity some other time. It's a win-win situation.

4. Get a bite to eat together. Everybody needs to eat, invite people to go to the Caf, go out to eat, or cook at someone's place. This is a great time to enjoy each other's company and commune with one another.

5. It's up to you. It's how you go into it; if you think you won't make friends- well then it's more likely that you won't. But if you take the time to be positive and understand that there is a place for you here, you will find yourself among friends.

6. Understand that you won't be friends with everyone. That's nice that you would like to be friends with everyone, but it's very hard to be. We all have different personalities and beliefs that help determine whom we'll be friends with. Don't stress out or force friendships. It's okay. You can still be friendly.

Pepperdine is a place for community and friendships. Don't worry - you'll find friends - just remember it takes time. If you have a tip or advice on how to make friends here at Pepperdine- tweet at us at Relationship_IQ or write on our Facebook wall.

-From your friends here at rIQ.

Written by: Shaina Kohli, rIQ Intern 2012, Pepperdine University class of 2013